Cars? What are cars good for? Horrible, slow, smelly things that pollute the atmosphere while doing so at a snails pace. Cars are way out dude - retro. It’s time to forget about those. Where we’re going we don’t even need wheels baby! It’s time for the fastest and most violent use of the word ‘speed’ this world has ever seen. Get ready for F-Zero, you’re going to need it, oh and don’t forget to buy some XL sick bags...
For those of you unfamiliar to the world of F-Zero it can be explained simply in a few words. The fastest racing game ever. And don’t think I’m lying. With tens of anti-gravity ‘ships’ to race with that can reach the speed of at least 2,000kph in a matter of seconds you’ll need to be prepared. At these amazing speeds you’ll be thrown over vast cities, dropped down long narrow pipes, skim past a sea of lava, dodge dozens of falling boulders and much more. The idea is simple. Get to the end first by any means. That means you’ll going to have to get violent to win these races of death, and believe me, you’re thrown in at the deep end.
Anyone who doesn’t like a challenge or likes to brake into a game easily probably won’t enjoy F-Zero. The story mode, where you play as Captain Falcon, is hard from the word go (well, from chapter 2 anyway) and it’s unlikely you’ll play through this in one sitting. The first place any newbie should go is definitely the Practice Mode which slowly breaks the player in with a variety of changeable options. Then there’s the Grand Prix. The player chooses a ship then races it through about five stages earning points. Nothing new there which is a shame as you’d think that the Grand Prix system would have evolved a little by the 26th century.
What sets F-Zero apart from the competition is its speed. I’m not joking when I say it’s amazing. Seeing is believing and with this game it just HAS to be played to be believed. When you hit 2,500kph while plummeting down a windy pipe with lava below you’ll know what I mean. You’ll know what speed is. You’ll know that you look the man.
The graphics are fantastic, and the FMV almost looks real! Thunder lights the sky with a bang, the fire and lava makes you sweat and the characters look lovely (yes, even the aliens!). Every game needs its characters and F-Zero has one of the most bizarre groups to grace a console. There are aliens, humans, robots and even a skeleton brought back from the dead! Each has their own ship and every one of them has a fantastic background story to boot, there’s a lot of fun to be had just choosing who you’re going play as!
Probably the best item in the game is the option to create a ship. Yes, you’re very own. With hundreds of parts to buy and colours to use you’ll spend most of your time fixing up your dream machine and painting it with your own (that’s right) designs.
F-Zero is one of the best games of 2003 and is also the best racer in the history of games. Forget Mario Kart, this is where the action is!